Friday, January 27, 2006

The MOST functional Word in our language

I don't need no stinking etymologists...
The most functional word?
Well...it's shit
That's right, shit!

Shit may just be the most functional word in the English language.
Consider:You can be shit faced,
shit out of luck,
or have shit for brains.

With a little effort, you can get your shit together,
find a place for your shit or decide to shit or get off the pot.

You can smoke shit,
buy shit,
sell shit,
lose shit,
find shit,
forget shit,
and tell others to eat shit and die.
Some people know their shit,
while others can't tell the difference between shit and shineola.

There are lucky shits,
dumb shits,
crazy shits,
and sweet shits.

There is bull shit,
horse shit
and chicken shit.

You can throw shit,
sling shit,
catch shit,
shoot the shit,
or duck when shit hits the fan.

You can give a shit
or serve shit on a shingle.
You can find yourself in deep shit
or be happier than a pig in shit.
Some days are colder than shit,
some days are hotter than shit,
and some days are just plain shitty
Some music sounds like shit,
things can look like shit,
and there are times when you feel like shit
You can have too much shit,
not enough shit,
the right shit,
the wrong shit
or a lot of weird shit.

You can carry shit,
have a mountain of shit,
or find yourself up shit creek without a paddle.
Sometimes everything you touch turns to shit,
and other times you fallin a bucket of shit and come out smelling like a rose.

When you stop to consider all the facts, it's the basic building block of creation. And remember, once you know your shit,you don't need to know anything else!You could pass this along, if you give a shit or choose not to read it, because...you don't give a shit......or save it with all your other shit.

As for me, I gotta go take a shit

3 Comments:

At 2:03 PM, Blogger gbradley said...

Ever notice how all of your shit is stuff, while everybody elses stuff is shit?

Got that from George Carlin.

 
At 10:09 AM, Blogger Addy said...

U R Absolutely right my friend.

Or how other people think certain comments or blog posts--lets say, are shit, but you're just happy that someone read it and made a wonderful comment!
Yeah, those people that think that are shitty.

 
At 6:47 PM, Blogger Izbaby said...

I don't see Dip Shit in there or am I missing it?

 

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