FINALLY Addy's Friend of the Day: Jessica

I've purposely been waiting to post this just to keep my pal Aaron on his toes. I know he's been waiting for this version of Addy's friend of the Day.

In my life, there have only been a handful of people that have inspired me in the most powerful of ways. Someone that makes you a better person, just for knowing them. An individual that gives of themselves and asks nothing in return, but your friendship and love.
For me, and so many others, is why I dedicate this post to my wondeful Friend, Jessica.
I met Jess not too long after Kevin and I had been dating. Jessica and her husband, Jeff invited us over to thier apartment for dinner. Jeff, like John, Aaron and Dan, also went to college with Kevin for engineering and would also be at this party. Needless to say, I was terrified and extremely nervous. This was the first time I'd be meeting many of these people, and all that flowed through my head were thoughts of inadequecy.
"Am I going to fit in with these people?" I thought.
I was more worried about meeting the women than the guys though. See, women hate women, it's a scientific fact. And typically, women aren't fond of other women infiltrating their fragile circle of "Friends" (which basically means they've surrounded themselves with women their husbands would never want to sleep with).

I could barely breathe when Kevin and I walked up to Jeff and Jessica's apartment.
Of course, like all men do, a quick intro was made and then the guys scurried outside for a smoke, and I'm sure, to talk smack about Kevin's newest "flavor of the week"!!!
So I was left alone with Jessica and Andrea (Dan's wife, who you'll meet soon).
Now you have to understand, I was a bit intimidated. Jess is a stunning woman, tall, beautiful long, blonde locks, perfect teeth, bright eyes, and then I look over at Andrea....tall, blonde, great smile- you get the picture. Well, once they started making small talk, I felt much more at ease. Jess (as well as Andrea) was a huge animal nut, just like me, in fact, we had all gotten along SO WELL that before the end of the evening, our conversation had even graduated to ripping on our significant others! A red letter day for any woman that needs to vent.
Jess was the most warm and genuine person I had met such a long time. She was a breath of fresh air for me, as was the entire evening of getting to know all of these wonderful people that would soon come to be my most cherished friends.

Flash forward a couple of years, when Kevin and I announced that we were getting married, similtaniously in accord with the announcement that we were going to have a baby, Jessica was such a sweetie and said she would help in whatever way she could. For my bridal shower, Jessica and Andrea brought me yellow roses, my ABSOLUTE FAVORITE! The funny thing is, that I don't remember ever telling them that, though Jess swore I had. It really was one of the nicest things anyone did for my shower.

Also, I forgot to mention that Jessica was expecting their first child at the same time I was, so she and I had become closer just in that manner alone. We became "bitching" buddies, always complaining and sharing our experiences about pregnancy. Jess was there to help me through the times when being pregnant AND planning a wedding were just too much to take. BELIEVE ME ---there were times I wanted to get away from everything.
i.e. Bachelor parties....GGGRRRRRRRRRR EVIL F*CKING MEN!
In retrospect, I should've asked Jessica (and Andrea) to stand up in our wedding if I had known what wonderful, wonderful influences they would be on my life. But we just didn't have enough friends on both sides to match people up.

Jessica gave birth to their beautiful baby girl in September of 2003. And this says what a wonderful friend she is... less than a week after their baby was born, I was having MY baby shower as I was due only 8 weeks after Jess. Jeff and Jessica CAME to my baby shower with their newborn Tess. It was so great! No one could believe how great Jess looked.
After Vinny was born(8 weeks later) in November of 2003, Jess and I then went from exchanging pregnancy woes to stories of new mommy blues. Not "Brooke Shields" mommy blues where she wanted to end it all, but there were some times that if I didn't have Jess to talk to, I don't know what I would've done. My eyes would've dried up and fallen out due to all the crying I was doing.
When Vinny was about 7 months old, a strange feeling came over me, and I was compelled to search for that home pregnancy test I vowed to bury after my son was born.
Of course... the damn thing came up positive and I just about shit my pants.
"What?!? I'm just starting to fit in my 7's again!"
So who did I call first? Jess.
The following is a reinactment of an actual telephone conversation that took place in July of 2004
"Jess, it's Addy"
"Hey Addy! How are you hun?"
"Uh ok. So I've been feellin' kinda weird lately and..."
"SHUT UP..."
"Yeah, so I found my spare EPT and..."
(Jess knew how EPT's came in a VALUE 2 pack, you know- just in case)
"SHUT UP..."
"Yeah, and it came up positive"
"You're F***ING joking right" *laughing*
"Nope."
"HOLY SHIT ADDY!!!" "Congratulations...I think" *still laughing*
A month later, we were all playing in a volleyball tournament in Hustler, Wi called the Hooterbowl.
Hooterbowl in Hustler, classy I know.
So when Jeff and Jess got in their hotel room, I jumped on their bed and began rubbing my ass all over it spreading my "prego germs". Jess immediately yelled, "Get off the bed! You're gonna curse us too!" Though the weather sucked, and it rained all weekend for an outdoor sand tournament, we had a blast...
and it seemed that my prego germs worked.
A few weeks later, Jess called me and didn't say anything but, "It's all your fault."
I couldn't believe it!!!!! It really wasn't my fault at all. Jess was prego before the tournament and just didn't know. So once again here we were, both expecting, at virtually the same time. People thought we went to some weird sex camp, which probably would've been pretty cool.

I am convinced that these circumstances fall on our husbands' shoulders. See, Kevin & Jeff have this strange non-competitive competition going on. It applies to tv's. When Jeff bought a big screen, Kevin got a bigger big screen. It applies to vehicles. Jeff bought a Chevy Avalanche, then Kevin got one too. Though Jeff has the Z31 package or whatever, so his is still better.
Then it applied to offspring. Jeff got Jess prego, so Kevin rebuttled. Then Kev thought he'd top Jeff and give us yet another baby, but Jeff would not be outdone so easily.
Our daughter Madison was born this April, and only 3 weeks after, in early May, Jeff and Jess welcomed their second little girl, Maya to the world.
Family life, though it came on very suddenly, without planning, seemed to work for Jess and me since we kinda had each other to lean on, knowing we would each understand the other.

Jessica is such a wonderful mother. She stayed strong with nursing her second child long after I'd put Maddy on formula. Maddy just wasn't getting the hang of nursing and I truely didn't mind not having her attached to my ta-ta 24/7.
In June, Jess told me she was having some trouble nursing too and that she was going to the doc to see what was going on. We all got together a few days later to go to the grand opening of our zoo's new feline house (very awesome by the way) and I wanted to ask Jess how the doctor's visit went then, but I didn't think it was the right time or place. So when Jess called me and said that they had found a lump in her breast, my heart sank deep into my stomach. Then a whirlwind of unwanted information of the worst news, surrounded us concerning our beautiful Jess that was wrapped up in two shocking words.
Breast cancer.
"How could this happen?!!" I thought. I was infuriated and confused. I felt much like myself at 9 years old again, trying to grasp issues far beyond my control. Jess is a healthy woman, 28 years old, lives a good life and has a beautiful family to care for. What the hell was going on here? This wasn't supposed to happen to people like her. I guess thats we all thought when we heard the rest of the news.
It turned out Jessica would need surgery to remove the mass. Since it was detected early, the out look was very positive that after the surgery, and routine chemo and radiation, Jess would have a full recovery. Doctors make it sound so simple though. Sure, you may lose a breast, you'll be sick all the time, you'll have to leave your job, you may lose your hair and your entire world will be turned upside down, but we did catch it early.
Through ALL of this, Jessica has been no less than an absolute inspiration to me and the hundreds of others her story has touched. With help from her tremendous family and friends, Jess ahs still managed to care for her family and still get out with us to tear it up at times.
We all participated in the Susan Komen Race for the Cure and you can read all about that on Aarons blog. Of course, I would've written about it, but I didn't want to steal Aaron's thunder. We had one of the largest first year teams, cause we all love her so damn much. Awe, i know. I don't have the pic of the ENTIRE team Jessica, I don't think I'd know how to minimize it enough to fit on here anyway! But here's the people that mean the most to me anyway...

From left to right: Kelly, Danno, Jessica & Maya, Andrea, Me & Maddy, Johnny, Aaron (with PINK saftey goggles), Kevin & Mr. Vinny, and Jeff is kneeling with Pretty Miss Tess on his shoulders

Jessica will be recieving her LAST chemo treatment this week!!!! YEAH! WOOHOO! WHOOP! WHOOP! Then she will have radiation, and hopefully be able to kiss this shit good bye. Then I'm takin' her out and us girlz are gonna get completely blitzed and curse the day we got breasts, though I'm still waiting for mine to arrive!

I do have other photos I will post up here for everyone to enjoy, but it is a long post so I will update this with new photos later.

So not only is Jess a wonderful friend, wife and mother, she is now an inspiration to women all over the globe that are dealing with the same issues this disease brings to millions of women. Thats whay I'm changing Jess from Addy's Friend of the Day, to "Addy's Friend of the Year" That means she gets a FREE Lifetime subcription to Inconspicuous Construction, otherwise known as, my blog. heehee

She has made such an impact on my life, I'm so blessed to have her as a friend.

Jess, here's to a wonderful upcomming 2006 for you and your amazing family! We love you!

For more info on Breast cancer awareness go here