Neil Diamond Does It To Me Too.

As I was driving to work today, Neil Diamond's song "You make it feel like Christmas" came on the radio. Normally I laugh whenI hear it because any Diamond fan will tell you that Neil is about as Jewish as a NY Goldsmith... and here he is cooin' about Christmas.
But today, the song didn't make me laugh, in fact, I almost had to pull over to choke back the tears. You see, my mom was a HUGE Neil Diamond fan and this past September 19th marked one year since my mom's death. Ironically, September 19th was also the day my daughter was baptized, so life it seems, does come full circle. And since my mom never got to meet Madison, it was very special to me.
When I spoke at my mom's funeral, I made a point of speaking about her passion for this Jewish Jazz Singer since his music was such a large part of her life. Not only did she love his music, she loved HIM as well. She would always say, "He can park his Yarmalka under my bed any day."

I literally grew up jammin to Neil. I can remember before I went to school, being home with my mom during the day and helping her clean the house. She would go get her 45 of "Hot August Night" and crank that baby while we danced, dusted and vacuumed. I always looked forward to cleaning the house with her because thats when she really came to life.
My mom and I never had that "mother/daughter" relationship where we exchanged beauty tips, shoes, and secrets about boys. She wore Wrangler jeans, Easy Spirit shoes and Harley shirts, though she was a looker back in the day. Think Lisa Lobe with the cole rimmed glasses.
I'm not ashamed to say that her untimely death was due mostly in part to her battle with alcoholism, a factor that highly contributed to our abnormal parent/child relationship.
She was 53 and drank right up to the night she died. But the one thing that always made her happy, apart from a drink, was listening to, talking about, or watching Neil Diamond. And Christmas, hands down, was her favorite time of year. Later on, as she got older, and sicker, she would try to play it off like she didn't care or that the holiday's were a hassle, but put a live decorated tree in front of her, and play
"You make it feel like Christmas" by Mr. Diamond himself, and her face would light up brighter than that tree. And I'd almost forgotten about that wonderful trait of hers until I heard that song today.
Christmas was the only time of year where we were a family. My Grandma would come over for the week and help my mom bake and cook to prepare our home for company. My two brothers (who are fraternal twins) fought less, and while my grandma was over, mom wouldn't drink. I think she looked forward to that as much as us kids did, since Grandma acted as the self control my mom so desperately needed and wanted in her life.

My mom was able to see Neil live in concert a few times when his tours brought him to the Milwaukee area. Once, her friend Sally arranged to have a limo pick up my mom to take them to the concert! It was years before she stopped talking about that.

And I was fortunate enough to see Neil play at the MGM Grand in Vegas right before New Years. It was an awesome concert and I have my sweetheart, Kevin to thank for taking me to that! (Thats how you know a guy loves you. Everyone else was going to see Cirque De Soilel and Kevin surprised me with tickets to the Diamond concert!)
It was a great story that I got to share with my mom...she was so jealous!

Now, I've listened to some Diamond since my mom has passed away, and it never really hit me like it did today. I guess it really brought back a lot of those memories I had long since buried while trying to deal with her death, and then having to take control of all of her funeral arrangements and estate divisions. But thats a whole other blog post.

Though I don't claim to be one of those people that says they can "Feel" their departed loved ones with them, there are times my mom definitely shines through me. The inherited passion for Neil Diamond is one of the things my mom passed on to me that I will never lose. Corny as it may seem, his music always brings me back to her, and I can once again see that special smile only Neil could bring to her face, and I will always be grateful to him for that.

"Love Molecule" only lasts for one year- big shocker

So I've republished this post, minus the side comments about individuals from my past that have proven to be offensive to some. I just couldn't bring myself to delete the entire post though. Not that it's good writing, or even that interesting, it's just the comment about the Puerto Rican pool boys always makes me giggle
Read on my friends.
Remember when you first met that special someone?
You couldn't concentrate on anything else but their smile. You longed to hear their voice even if you just got off the phone with them after a two hour conversation about-nothing.
You thought and thought about how great the sex would be with them, only comming to find out how right you were (hopefully).
Remember those feelings? You welcomed a romantic night in, a rented movie and a frozen pizza, that just meant you were gearing up for an all night romp-a-thon.

Some of you may have to think pretty damn hard to remember those feelings. Well, congratulations because that means you've been in a long term committed realtionship. The bad news is, most of those feelings dimenished within the first year of courtship according to Pavia University researchers.

"The powerful emotions that bowl over new lovers are triggered by a molecule known as nerve growth factor (NGF) "

"The Italian scientists found far higher levels of NGF in the blood of 58 people who had recently fallen madly in love than in that of a group of singles and people in long term relationships"

Now here comes the no brainer scientific evidence that an MATC attendee such as yours tuely could even figure out...

"But after a year with the same lover, the quantity of the "love molecule" in their blood had fallen to the same level as that of the other groups"

FACINATING?...not really.

Researchers said it was not clear how falling in love triggers higher levels of NGF, but the molecule clearly has an important role in the "social chemistry" between people at the start of a relationship.
Well let's try to decipher this phenomenon, wrapped in an enigma, shall we?

The first year...everything is new and exciting.

You haven't found out yet that he's a cheap bastard that only drops cash on the "pussy of the month" club, and he has no clue about that cruise you went on where you rode 20 Puerto Rican pool boys like SeaBiscuit.
Everything is beautiful, you're even willing to look past some those "icky" habits like smoking or doing body shots off of a voodoo woman named Phylis. You LOVE this person, and that makes everything right as rain.
But it's a L-O-N-G trip around the sun and little by little, you discover this person is just as flawed as you are, and soon those "icky" habits become the deal breakers in a relationship.

So what level are the NGF's in a person who's been married for a couple of years...and has a couple of kids???!!! I'm afraid to know and it's too late to worry. I'll just have to pull out the leather and hand cuffs more often.

So my advice to all of you in that first year of new love...don't waste the nerve growth factor molecules. They're very important neurorecepters.
Keep some things to yourself for a while, savor the excitement and discovery.
Reveal all of those wonderful secrets like treasured gifts, a little at a time.

Hold out on the Puerto Rican pool boys until after you're married.

For now, I've got some leather to squeeze into for my man. I'll yelp if I need assistance

Addy's Friend of the Day is almost ready to emerge

I've put my heart into this one, more so than any other Friend of the Day thus far....

Please visit back later to meet Addy's WONDERFUL Friend of the Day.....
JESSICA

Baby's crying again....IT'S YOUR TURN BEEYATCH

I am revising little bits and pieces of this post as my hubby felt he was shed in a bad light, which wasn't really my intention when I wrote this. So anything you'll notice in red print are my new revisions. Happy now Mr. Prad? Love ya!
When you first have a baby, their cries of helplessness and total dependency melt your heart, and you flock to their every need...
THEN- a couple of months go by and you find yourself smack dab in the middle of a moral dilemma.
"Should I go get her? ....Or should I let her cry it out?"
My Mitchievillian bloggers had the saying,
"If you ignore the crying baby, it will stop." headlining their blog for quite some time.
Well, that does not work with this little girl I've got living in my house.
So like most couples deal with crying children in the middle of night, I try to wait it out until my husband goes and gets her. It solves all my problems! Yeah right. Sometimes I'm fortunate enough to be in a deep coma where I don't even hear the crying, but Kevin swears that I practically force him out of bed to go care for our whimpering infant, even in my sleep.

This is a very true statement because he told me this himself!!!
We're usually pretty good about alternating duty when the kids wake up at night, but last night was just hellish, wrapped in a demonic blanket. Kevin is very good about getting up with the kids, especially after they were first born. Kevin would let me get my sleep and he would have baby duty all through the night. Even when I was nursing, Kevin was my rock. He would feed me graham crackers and juice while I held Vinny, and then Maddy, while they nursed. He really helped me keep up my energy, and my spirits during a very tough time for me.
Let me take you there.
12:09 am- Maddy cries. Prepare routine bottle, resnuggle baby, turn on mobile, quietly exit castle room and return to bed, still in half sleep mode

12:20 am- Maddy cries again, usually means baby lost the bottle. Reconfigure comfortable angle of bottle, quietly exit.
12:21 am- Damn door clicks when trying to close it quietly, baby cries again. This time, baby must be picked up and snuggled for a few minutes to calm her down. Place her back in crib, tip toe back to bed after
ever- so- gingerly closing nursery door.
12:42 am- More crying. This time, I just lay very still in bed and regulate my breathing so husband will assume I'm sleeping and answer this call himself. Yes, i did do that
12:45 am- Maddy continues crying even after Kevin goes to her aid
12:48 am- Severe crying ensumes, now mixed with shrillish screams and hyperventillation. Guilt begins to well over me
12:49 am- Re-enter the scene to find red-cheeked, tear stained, sniffling infant being held by equally red-cheeked, tear stained, father with blood shot eyes. He was very tired, underestandibly

I aimlessly stumble around in the dark to find the Infants Tylenol, as we evaluated her condition is due to teething. Trip over toy radio that makes the sound of a clowns car horn and it begins playing "You're a grand old flag" which in turn makes Maddy cry again.
12:58 am- At this point, Kevin & I just laugh at each other's attempts to soothe this very unhappy little human as we basically scratch our heads and asses (I scratched my head, he scratched his ass) as to what to do. OK, he didn't scratch his ass, but it was funny and he does do it often enough that it would have fit the moment anyway
1:05 am- Husband returns to comfortable, pillow ridden california king size bed, leaving me...with her. He did go to bed, but Kev needed to get up at 5am to get ready for work, he just started his new job at GE Medical(yeah Kevin!) so he needs to be at his best
I begin to hallucinate, my muscles tremble and due to my hysterics... I'm whisked into a game show setting, where I'm apparently loosing my ass to someone who hasn't even lived long enough to see all the phases of the moon.
In the distance I hear a mans voice....

"Ladies and Gentlemen, It's time for another exciting round of...

(roaring applause)

By the way, that is NOT a picture of my daughter. Though she does have many similarities to this Angry Baby

and the omniscient announcer continues speaking...

"The Game Show where contestant parents try to soothe unruly babies in a conquest for sleep! Who will succeed? Who will fail? Ask the Angry Baby!"

"Our first contestant is a fiery red-head that is highly proficient in snuggling, diaper tossing and bringing stuffed animal's to life . Lets give it up for...Mama Addy!" (applause)

"What will be our contestants first question for angry baby?"

At this point, I try sitting down in the glider rocker with Maddy. "Okay sweetie, you wanna' sit with mumma and rock?"

Omniscient announcer interjects in a PGA whisperish tone, "She's trying the glider now, a no fail technique that worked wonders with her first born." Omniscient announcer gives play-by-play updates to the intrigued audience as I try working my motherly magic.

"Angry Baby seems to like this technique, her eyes are beginning to roll back in her little head. Mama Addy may have this one in the bag, although Angry Baby has only fallen asleep in Mama Addys arms a select few times, lets watch and see what transpires...."

As I attempt to stand and walk her over to her crib, Maddy begins to awaken, so I go into the "bounce and sway" motion to seduce her back to sleep.

"Oh what a pro Mama Addy is" Omniscient announcer says, "She's going right into the bounce and sway motion. That really is a lost art form folks."

I go to lay Maddy down, keeping her body entirely parallel to the mattress so I don't jar her in any way, shape or form. Anticipation grows in the audience of Ask The Angry Baby...

"This could be it...Mama Addy has comforted Angry Baby in less than five questions, this could be a new record....but wait! Angry Baby is stirring, Mama Addy couldn't slide her hand out from beneath Angry Baby's body---She's awake!"

And then.....AAAAAHHAHHAHHAHHHHHHHAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!shit.

I hurrily grasp her close to me and begin bouncing her. "It's ok sweetie, it's ok" I repeat to her over and over. AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHAHHAHHAHHHAHH! She just keeps crying.

1:32 am- AAAAAAHHHHHHHAHAHHAHHA!

"Do you want your bottle sweetie?"

Omniscient announcer keeping quick tabs on my questions, "Oh, she's resorting to Asking Angry Baby again. Lets see how this question pans out for her."

AAHHH AAh *gurgle *gurgle *slurp*...AAAAHHHHHHHAAAAHHHHH!!!!!

"Well that was a waste of a question and Mama Addy is quickly losing sleep as well this battle with Angry Baby"

I started losing my patience too.

"Do you want your nuk Maddy?"

-AAAHHH!!! *suck* suck* PTEWEY! AAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

So I lay Maddy back down, screaming relentlessly,in the crib and walk away to think. It was either that or make the daybreak news with a case of shaken baby syndrome.

"What is Mama Addy Doing? She'll never win this game that way, she knows that. Wait! She's returning with something in her hand...it's- it's Baby Orajel Nighttime Formula. There's no stopping her now, the only thing left would be a shot of bourbon with a Nyquil chaser, duely beneficial in this case."

I picked Maddy up and wiped all the snot off of her face after her cry-a-thon and she just stared at me like "You b***h. How could you?!!"

I squeezed an ample amount of Orajel on my finger and wiped it on every inch of possible teething gum line in her mouth. Of course Maddy makes nothing easy...

Omniscient announcer educates the nail biting crowd...

"Mama Addy is skillfully dodging the blows Angry Baby is throwing with all of her appendages, including lethal headbuts. To our devoted Ask the Angry Baby Audience, be advised, once those fontanels have fused, your infant is a killing maching with a cannonball melon"

I let the medicine do it's stuff as I cradled Maddy in her warm fleece blanket.

1:58 am- Finally, Maddy fell asleep asleep. Thank the Lord Above, or the makers of Orajel.

As I crept out of Maddys room with cat like precision that would make Indiana Jones shudder, the applause faded into the background and I heard the omniscient announcer say,

"That'll do it for our latest exciting round of..."

2:12 am- I finally lie down.

(By the way Kevin was still slightly awake wondering what I did to our child to quiet her down)

4:15 am- Vinny wakes up crying....

If you thought this took forever to read...try living it!

VINNY'S 2!!! Holy #@$% -we need cake!

Here's my little buddy sitting nice with his sister. The pic is all stretched out for some strange reason. But never the less, they're still cute.

I'm franticly trying to prepare our home for my son's second birthday party this Saturday. Of course, minus the half hour or so I blog as to center my Chi.
We're doing a Jungle Theme for Vin. He LOVES animals.
Come to think of it, how many toddlers don't love animals?
So I'm hanging all of those "decorative vines" you can buy at the Dollar Store, from the walls and ceiling. And since Vinny's room already has jungle decor, I'm just moving all of his shit from one room to the other really.
Hanging monkeys and birds, BIG stuffed giraffes and elephants, a ride-on lion, yeah, we don't spoil our kids. Though I must say, MOST of those things are from Vinny's loving grandma. She's the reason Vinny will be in therapy at age six because Santa didn't bring him that Hummer for Christmas. lol
We do spoil a little - but NOTHING compared to a story I heard about last night.
Parents in CA dished out a half a million dollars for their daughter, Amber's 13th birthday party.
WTF????????
They said that Amber is a wonderful person, makes straight A's in school and is very entrepreneurial in designing her own fashion line. Fabulous.
Give the delicate flower a $100 savings bond and buy her a bolt or two of her favorite fabric so she can get to sewing her clothes for the next four years of high school, because you better believe I wouldn't be buying her anything for a very long time.
Obviously, money is no object to this family because the parents said they felt, "She deserved this". Listen very carefully to me....
No 13- year- old deserves a $500,000 party...just for being alive!!!
Doogie Howser, at a tender age, saved lives every day and Dr. Howser and his hottie wife never gave the Doogster a party like that.
Amber (and the only reason I remember her name is because there were huge signs of her name in Vegas style lights at her party. Flippin' ridiculous) wore a custom made dress by Dolce & Gabana, and had singer, Ashanti and some other pop/rap stars sing at her "coming of age" soiree.
Amber said, "There were some pretty good parties this year, but mine was probably the best. People are still talking about it."
What a spoiled bitch. I'm still talking about the time my friend Sara had a limo for her birthday when were were in 5th or 6th grade. It came and picked us up on the last day of school (Sara's b day is June 7th) and we went around downtown Milwaukee jammin' to Mariah Carey. We went to the "WITCHES HOUSE" near the lake and threw rocks at her strange art work in her gated yard. Then we went to a house boat, an actual house that looked like a boat and I was yelling for Noah to come out. And we all spent the night by Sara's and froze each other's -AA bras.
Those are memories $500,000 just can't buy. I'm sorry.

So Amber, you can kiss my ass birthday girl. All I ever wanted was a pony with a horn stuck on it's head so I would be the only girl with a real unicorn...well I never got it. And on Saturday, Vinny isn't getting a pony either. He'll get some awesome pizza (his personal fav), a couple gifts he needs about as much as he needs cross country shoes, and some loving friends and family.
And just for the record, if I DID have the funds to do it "Amber style" for my kids...I STILL WOULDN'T. My kids would be singing the praises of God that I still let them live in my mansion once they turned into evil pre-teens and teenagers.
If any of you feel that Vinny is some how getting jobbed for his big second celebration. Blog me about it, and I'll tell you where you can send your checks or Credit Card numbers!

Guess who's comming for blogs and cookies....

Addy's Friend of the Day is very near. Need something to tide you over while you anxiously wait in joyful hopes for my next grand friend unveling?

Here's a hint:
This person is blonde-ish,
Does not have brown eyes,
(well, maybe has one brown eye)
Is extremely intelligent,
-now I'm really narrowing the field for you
And has not posted anything on this blog

Don't worry, I had a hard time with MENSA questions at first too. The answer will be revealed very soon...

HAPPY 175TH HARRIET!!!

I love stories like these.
One of the world's oldest living animals, Harriet the tortoise, celebrated her 175th birthday on Tuesday -- with a pink hibiscus flower cake at her retirement home in Northern Australia, where she has spent the past 17 years.
Australian Zoologists say the Giant Galapagos Land Tortoise was collected by scientist Charles Darwin in 1835, although some historians have disputed this.

There is no doubt however over the age of Harriet -- who for more than a century was thought to be a male and named Harry -- and she is recognised by Guinness World Records as the world's oldest living chelonian, or reptile with a shell of bony plates.

"She would definitely be the oldest living animal on Earth ... I can't see why she shouldn't live till 200," Australian conservationist and television celebrity Steve Irwin, who owns Australia Zoo north of the city of Brisbane, told Guinness World Records.

I think our society has become so desensitized, that all we are interested in, is drama and catastrophy. We need to re-educate ourselves to appreciate the intriguingly positive occurances that take place on our home planet.
SO- I'm flippin' the scripts people!!! I'm all about Harriets Birthday today, and there's nothing the Prasident can do about it!

So the next time you're complaining about how OLD you are...it could be worse- you could be a turtle.
Then we would have to deal with your whining for another 125 years.

Happy Birthday Harriet!

Somebody get that shell back a shot of J.D. for Christs Sake!

Hair Raising Weekend

Here are three of my friends that I worked with in the Redken Hairshow
this year, as well as show's in the past too. Yes, they're all hot,
and yes they all have boyfriends. I'm the homely one in black.
This past weekend, I was privileged to model for Redken 5th Avenue again. I've modeled in their hair shows for the past 7 years now, and it has always been an amazing experience every single time I've done it.
This was their big show in WI, hosted by the Grand Geneva Resort and Spa in Lake Geneva.

*Little known fact about the Grand Geneva, it was once owned by Heff himself and was used as one of his Playboy retreats.
Though it is an immense amount of fun and it pays well, it is always a very long weekend, with very long days. The model call was held on Friday night, and the last show day is held on Monday.
(which was something that did not sit well at all with my husband so I don't know if I'll be doing any more shows)
For those of you who aren't familiar with the term "model call", it is when models and talent audition to be in the hair show or any show for that matter. Selection depends on your look, your experience, and the need stylist's have for someone with a certain hair type. Then once- or if you're picked, you have to be back there the next day at the ass crack of dawn for "Prep day".
Imagine going to a salon and having your hair done for ten hours. This is prep day. You're hair is washed, then blown dry and flat ironed. Colored and washed again. Blown dry, and more color applied. Washed again. Blown dry, flat ironed again, then cut. Cut a little more and a little more after that. Texturizing, dry cutting, asymmetrical lines, blending, point cutting, razor cutting and framing. All terminology I was clueless of before doing the hair shows.

It really is an art, hair design, and these stylists are the best in their industry. They travel around the globe educating fellow stylists about the latest "cutting" edge looks and techniques to take back to the salon with them. Then the elements of runway and theatrical performance are set in the mix for excitement and intrigue during the show.
The actual shows only last about an hour or so, but the preparation is the majority of the work.

Here's our stylist, Danny, getting Nick's hair just right, before showtime. Nick is a fireman and so they thought they'd pay homage to his honorable, heroic profession, and color and cut his hair to look like it was on fire! Very coolAnd here is the main stage we do our shows on. It's a little dark, but hundreds of stylists are in the crowd and my pal Rena, is shown on the "jumbo tron" while her stylists discuss her hair to the attentive audience.
On Sunday night, after the Redken teams have successfully completed thier first day of demonstrations, and us models are thoroughly exhausted from having our hair tugged, pulled, back combed and chemically overtreated --- there is a huge frickin' party.

This is what makes the previous two days worth while.
First of all--- stylists are raging alcoholics. C'mon, they admit it themselves. What other profession serves martinis and Bloody Mary's at 8 am for a job training seminar???
So by the time the party is going on, everyone has been drinking for the past 12 hours, so you can imagine the good times that can come from that alone.

Once Monday morning rolls around, everyone stumbles into the "salon" room either hung over or over tired...but still sporting some HOT hair. You feel as though you've known all of these people for decades, after having spent the last 3 days inseparable from your group. And we all know that when dealing with women or homosexual men, it only takes about 4 hours to get their entire life history.
But it really is great to befriend people in the hair styling industry. They're SO much fun! I always walk away with a new appreciation for culture and open mindedness -is that a real word or a ghetto word? See- culture and an open mind.

Most of the hair show stylist's also work on people that aren't necessarily professional models, as these individuals most accurately represent their everyday clients that come into the salon.
I HIGHLY suggest putting this on your to-do list if the opportunity ever presents itself to you. EVEN GUYS! They do so many great things on men, you just have to trust them. Most times, the stylists see you at your best before they've even touched your hair, you just have to give them that chance to show you how good you can be.

Don't be confused. Travis and Stephanie aren't that short, Dennis is just that tall. He's 6'8" or 6'9" and only had about 3 inches of clearance from the ceiling

All in all, it is worth the time and effort to participate in an event with such a reputable company. Redken has never done anything to my hair that I've been disappointed by. The stylists are amazing artists and the adrenaline rush you get from the stage work is insurmountable. Then to get to know them on a personal level and party with these fun loving, worldly travelers is always a mind blowing experience. Reminds me of how much I'll still never know.

So, if this was indeed my last show, it was definitely worth it.

Redken rocks!

WTF is Body Molding?!?!

You are having the great honor of reading the blog of the official "CANDIES" brand Fit Model- ME.

No, this is not me (damnit)

this is obviously Jenny McCarthy in her controversial ad for Candies Brand Shoes,

I'm the FIT MODEL for Candies...

Here I am! Great photo hey? My eyes really stand out in this photo don't they?

I get to be behind the scenes while the garments are in a delicate stage of the design process and need to be revamped before being put into mass production. Not quite as glamourous as having my own billboard in NY, but I'm no Jenny McCarthy either.

What I get to do is travel to L.A. to meet with the other fit models Candies uses and they are going to make a MOLD of my body. Yes, I said a MOLD of my body, so when they need to fit garments that will eventually be sold by Kohls, they can use my body in L.A. without me having to be there all the time.

Personally, I wouldn't mind a visit to LaLa Land every couple of months, but that whole, "married with kids" thing just doesn't fly with the big wigs.

So when I was told that a mold was going to be done, I was a little freaked out at first. The only other time I'd ever heard of body molding was on a "Skinamax" special about adult toys. I think you could purchase a mold of Jenna Jameson's panooch or something...or was it - BUY the mold that grew on Jenna Jameson's panooch? Whatever.

I will ask the "mold technician" in L.A. if I can have a mold for my husband when he's away with the military- just so I can see the look on his face, actually BOTH their faces!

Currently, I visit Kohl's corporate office weekly and they try their upcomming fashions on me to see where changes need to be done, right now we're fitting shorts for summer '06

So the next time you go to Kohl's or anywhere Candies brand is sold and are trying on a pair of size 7 anythings...they were designed specifically to my core body demensions, so don't bitch when they don't fit right! I warned you.

Amusement park sex

I am a person who is perfectly comfortable with public displays of affection (PDA's). In fact, I welcome it from my husband.
But I've come a long way from the PDA's I consider appropriate compared to what I would've done ten years ago.
Kevin and I went to Great America in Gurnee IL. over Halloween weekend for their "end of operating season" celebration called, "FRIGHTFEST".
The entire amusement park is transformed for halloween and they have special shows, attractions and haunted houses. It's very cool.
I've always thought that Great America is a better place to go on a first date versus a movie or a concert, just because you have ample time to really get to know each other while you're waiting 90 minutes in line for a ride that lasts 32 seconds.
Of course most men (or women for our egalitarian society members) wouldn't want to pay roughly $100.00 for a first date -understandibly.

It always brings me great enjoyment to people watch while in line at Great America. The civil engineers didn't disappoint when they configured the layout for crowd control in places like Great America or Disneyland. By the time you reach your destination, you know at least 40 people by name and agenda without ever speaking to them.

"Oh-they're the ones who got trashed last night and came here on a whim after a 3 am White Castle craving."

Some people though, you know all about without ever hearing them speak.
They're the ones who are doing all but actually engaging in full on sex while they're in line, and honestly, they're my favorites to watch! Why? Well, they're the easiest to make fun of, number 1. Then, you KNOW they're doing it to get attention so they are purposely trying to look sexy. It's like porn for the seriously deprived and uneducated.
Though I must admidt that I've probably been the focus of someones stares and snickers as I engaged in somewhat less-than-appropriate PDA's in the past.
Now it was chilly, as it always is in the Chicago area in the end of October, so I snuggled up to Kevin in line and we made "intimate physical contact" from time to time. But I wonder why now I'm not so keen on the idea of a hot and steamy make out session in front of hundreds of people, as once upon a time, it wouldn't have bothered me.
Is it maturity, or embarrassment?
Kevin and I were amongst the oldest "couple"-- that wasn't there with children that is, so I suppose we were setting a good example for our nations youth. I'm sure if Kevin and I started making out in line, some 12 year old boys would be like "AWE MAN! Fuckin' Gross - check out those old people!"
Well, they'd probably say "Awe Man! Look at that old guy getting it on with that hot chick! SWEET!" lol
But why should I feel hesitant or ashamed to be affectionate towards my husband in a place like that when there are so many other people doing the same thing? And very poorly I might add.
So I think next year I'm gonna plan to take Kevin in a dark corner of a haunted house and completely ravage him right then and there. And if people happen to pass by and notice us in "the act", becomming completely terrified in the process, we'll they paid to be scared right?!? They just got their monies worth then.

New design to realign

So being the woman I am, I decided to scrap the spotted backdrop and change up my layout a bit. That was the only way to go since I couldn't get my articles to post at the top of my blog for some strange reason.

I'm not sure if I like this layout better, but it works for now. So if you don't visit for the compelling writing, visit to see which background I have tomorrow.

Yes, you ARE the man

I'd like to thank my wonderful friend, Dani for sending me this photo.
Maybe with more bathrooms like this, you guys won't have to worry about the jag next to you gettin' penis envy when he "gazes" over to you in a drunken stooper.
Because-believe me, it's not us women that have penis envy, we just smile and ooohh and aahhhh to fuel your ego so you'll buy us expensive jewelry.

By the way, I'm diggin' the funnel shaped urinals. All they need are splash guards and I'll be first in line at home depot when they come out.
So, riddle me this... what kind of engineers design these?

Cock and Toast- best thing I had on Saturday night

I had one of the best comedic experiences of my life on Saturday night.
I attended the midnight showing entitled "COCK n' TOAST" at ComedySportz comedy club.
The show is entirely composed of improv like skits that are inspired by audience comments. Very much like the show, "Who's line is it anyway" but better in my opinion.
The only difference is that the midnight show is not censored, which makes it all the more hillarious.

I wish I could explain how frickin' funny it was, but me telling you that they were inacting bowling, only there, the bowling ball is made from chapped lip skin and the pins were the cast of the broadway musical "CATS" probably wouldn't strike a chord with anyone unless you were there to see it!

One of ComedySportz genius actors, named Bill Bartell instructed me to tell at least two people about the kick ass time I had at the Cock n' toast show. Well Bill, I hope this counts because a lot more than two people will see this and hopefully take my word for it when I tell them that EVERYONE should take in a ComedySportz show.
It truely will be one of the best laughs you'll ever have!
Bill, Dylan, Tim, Eric, Dave and Brian... thanks so much again for the laughs! You guys f***in' ROCK!

I'm back people!

I want to apologize to my faithful visitors for not suppling you with your daily dose of Addy's world in over two weeks. I'm sure you've been lost without me. *very loud snicker*
Like lovers who've become too comfortable with one another, I haven't given my blog the attention it really needs.
It's not that I've had a shortage of things to blog about...just the opposite really.
So now, I'm getting my fingers warmed up on the homerow and preparing spellcheck for it's ultimate test.

I've got a lot to share, I just need the time. BUT- please visit back soon cause I'm talking about L.A. body molding, rollercoaster sex,
toddler birthday SOS and of course, Addy's Friend of the Day.

I'm ready - are YOU?